Blurred Lines

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Oh hey there.  You're looking hot.   I hope you don't mind me saying.

I wanted to write about a big topic today.  It's not pretty, it's not polite, and it's messy. Because today I am writing about rape.  If you think you will find this post upsetting, offensive or a trigger for you, feel free to switch off now. I won't be offended.

Here goes. I know I've hinted at past trauma in previous posts. And you may have already guessed what happened to me.

But The Rebel Poetess is all about being 100% real, and I am hoping this will be the last post of this type. I am seeing a counsellor now, and want the blog to be about what I intended it for. Books, poetry, arts, food, beauty, politics.

But if I sugar coat anything it isn't true and it isn't right. I would be misleading you.

So, basically, my first time, was not consensual. Yes I am talking about rape. I was 18, and it was somebody I knew.  I know this will be upsetting and maybe shocking to read. I have processed it. It was half my lifetime ago.

But the experience shaped me and the way I view love and sex. It affected me. I waited for my first time to be with someone I was in love with and that was taken away from me.  But it happens to so many people. I'm not belittling my experience. But this is why the #metoo movement was so important.

The culture of rape and sexual abuse is one of silence, and -sorry to swear, but that's bullshit.  I have taken my voice back.  I refuse to shut up. I am not publicly shaming anyone.  But I thought my only way out of my situation was in a boat or in a box, and I'm loving my secret third option life path.

So if anyone wanted to comment on this, please don't message me. Don't tell me your story. You can do that face to face if you need to talk I'm here for  you.  If anyone wants to help the movement, please comment with the hashtag #metoo

Men can be raped too. If we want equality men and women deserve to be heard equally.

No means no. There are no blurred lines. Rape can occur within a relationship, a marriage, or between strangers. It's never OK.

Reading:   Russeell Brand; Recovery -Freedom from our Addictions

Listening to: Apeshit, The Carters

Watching; Nothing, I don't have a TV anymore

Beauty: Aloe Vera gel

Food: Bangers(wahey!)

Drink: Currently working on a major espresso habit

Travel: North Wales

Current obsession: Dylan Thomas, anything related to Wales really

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