The Rebel Poetess

As I mentioned in a previous blog post, I am a Child of the 80s.   I grew up in an era where we swam in rivers, made dams in the middle of a stream, and built sandcastles on the beach.   It was the best of times. But everyone has to grow up.   And I did.   I became -quoting Britney here-a girl, then a woman.   Now I'm -quoting Little Britain, a lady!   I'm 36 years old.   And yet sometimes I yearn for the long hot summers where I had no other responsibilities than what hat to wear, and which friend was my best friend that day.   What can I say, I had-still do- a lot of friends. We've become a culture obsessed with smartphones, with technology, and having it all.   I remember in Friends when Chandler, Joey, and Ross realise they are getting older when they go out to a club and finds the music too loud and just want a hot drink at the end of the night.   I feel like that sometimes. I went out last night, to a Metal Night at T...

I had a counselling session the other day.   It was the first one for a number of weeks, for various reasons.   The NHS has really let me down   this year.   I know we are lucky to have it, but there have been huge failings by my GP surgery, and the Mental Health team.   To be frank with you, every organisation which has had a Duty of Care towards me has failed me, in one way or another. If I didn't have a superhuman inner strength, I really don't think I could have got through this. Without an amazing networks of writer friends, colleagues, friends from school and family.   I truly believe if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be here right now.   You would be reading my obituary, not my blog.   I know that may be upsetting, shocking for some to read.   But back in May I was at rock bottom.   I'd had to leave my household due to domestic abuse and was living in emergency accommodation.   I was dealing with the fallout of a relatio...

I had a really happy childhood. It was a typical childhood of the 80s. Playing in rivers. Making dams. Swimming in the sea. Feeling the sand under my feet.  I was a sickly child but I was always happy.  I grew used to the Drs appointments and the hospital visits. My attitude was always to just get on with it and keep smiling. But the adulthood has been extremely unhappy. Two long term relationships. Both abusive. Other trauma.  Big deal. Who hasn't been through shit in their lives?  Because life isn't about things being rosy all the time. What family isn't dysfunctional, Because I know one who is. The Royal Family. Maybe that's why the world is captivated by them. They fuck up in public. Prince Philip always puts his foot in it. Fergie is always embarrassing The Royals. The black sheep of the family. Well we know what happened to Princess Di. What the new generation of Royals have done for Mental Health is nothing short of superhuman. Because people aren't afr...